Tuesday, July 12, 2011
Don't Give Up!
I have been avoiding MRI's and xrays. It is time to bite the bullet so to speak and so I am sent for an MRI. You know what? I think that has to be the scariest thing I have ever done. All those times when I felt scared or worried about putting myself out there with my artwork, pale in comparison.
An MRI is where you are place inside a rather snug fitting tube and they take images, in this case, images of my spine. Since I am unable to stand or lie straight without feeling excruciating pain, the procedure is physically challenging for me. Having to hold a position for an extended period also becomes emotionally challenging when I just want to say stop, I've had enough.
On the form I ticked that I was not claustrophobic, once I am restricted in movement and inside that tube, I kind of want to go back and change my answer. I manage to get through it all, barely.
Standing to paint, hurts. Sitting to paint, hurts when I go to move. I am feeling a little sorry for myself. It is only momentary. I look around and see people who are using walkers or wheelchairs and I give thanks for having legs that can ache, a back that can hurt, that I am still able to paint, that I have a wonderful family who are helpful and kind. Lucky me, life is pretty good. There is nothing to do but get on with it. Just do it!